Sunday, December 5, 2010

Reflections on Change

As I walked to the store yesterday, passing house after house, either abandoned or for sale, the cold wind pushing at my face seemed to say, “I’m coming. My name is Change.”

Yes, the “c” word. Make that a capital “C”.

One of the main concepts I took from a brief foray into Buddhism is that nothing remains the same. Everything changes; be it the rocks under your feet, the car in your driveway, or the planet earth itself.

I’m a 54 year old woman. Change unsettles me. Yet, at this point in my life I welcome it. Why? Because things cannot go on as they were or are now. My family struggles financially. My husband of 22 years with a few health issues and my 20 year old daughter in great health **crosses fingers** are both uninsured. None of us has been to the doctor or dentist for several years. We cannot afford to go. Even though I am insured through my employer, I cannot afford the co-pay. 

That also points out how quickly we could add another house to that list of vacant houses in my neighborhood.  It wouldn't take much to push us over that edge.  I don't care what your political leanings are, it is grossly evident that we have to do something.

Yes, I look forward to change. Yet, I’m one of those people who avoid confrontation. I back down rather than fight - unless I see a grave mistake (like SB1070 was/is).  So the inclination right now is to pull in my oars and ride it out. Still, I won’t be completely passive. I will use my personal center of gravity, to lean this way or that, to steer my craft through the turbulence of change.